Thursday, November 15, 2012
The price of success
A nice clip from the link given here : Nice to share with many of my nice readers, and those not so nice ones will be watching anyway, perhaps ... becoming nice and find that I came here to blog ... in my own blog ... with peace. Be success with you all.
Choose your suffering!! Cool ...
Quote : The price of success is hard work, dedication to the job at hand, and the determination that whether we win or lose, we have applied the best of ourselves to the task at hand. Vince Lombardi
What are the price of success to any of us? How do we define success? What are the ingredients needed ... to be as successful as we individually defined? How do one measure success ... and at what levels of success ... that we will ultimately satisfied with our achievements?
In my eyes, I am a successful person. I certainly have many more things to acheive and have plenty of rooms for improvements in everything I am doing or venturing into, I still could be proud of myself ... I am a successful person, in my own personal standard.
Let me trying to recall and reflect on my successes ... and hopefully, not blowing my own horns?
It is a subject ... an important one, so I was told since young. If you do not know your Maths, you will not be successful. My aunt taught Maths in primary ... so, I would be helping her to mark some exercises books. I was in my early secondary level where Maths was not my strong, I was too lazy to practise(busy with footballing) ... I was simply do not have a good learning habit. So, tho I do not fail, I was one of the few who obtained an A2 in SRP, while most of my friends scored A1. I do know I could done better ... if I have tried.
Add-Math was a struggle ... sigh ... simply do not understand why they are killing us with those complex equations which we will be use in our daily lives. But, after failing my first Add-Math test ... and when my aunt consoled me, by telling me ... it is OK, not everyone can do Add-Math and asking me if I want to drop the subject? My Add-Math teacher, Mrs Oh was a very kind and good teacher ... and said that I have the 'brain' to work things out but lack of focus, lack of practise(busy with chess and badminton) ... somehow, I was a failure in many things I do. Being a 'piece of joke' by many around, being in poor-family ... and low self-esteem ... it is like I just could not find the motivation. I do remember ... of giving up my lives. I have nothing to lose, nothing to gain. Brought up without parents ... I went 'wild'. One may not even believe that I was involved in gangsterism ... many discipline problems in school ... and certainly I could not focus in studying. I really dislike sitting down to do any homework, and mugging books never occured in my schooling lives ...
Anyway, I took up the challenge ... I told myself I will do those Maths till I am good in it ... and beat those many 'above' me. That sheer determination ... in me, was superb. Reflecting back ... I think I have this desire ... to be successful. In fact, I told myself ... I want to be a Math teacher ... the best Math teacher around, if possible. Those setbacks ... was too strong for my low self-esteem person. If I failed, I know I might run-away, taken a negative direction in life?
I worked and worked ... phew ... about 4-6 hours per day, only Maths ... and more Maths. I went to the 'mobile' library to borrow some Maths book every week as I could not afford to buy some books. I will sit for hours ... until I get the solutions or the idea ... on solving those challenging and difficult questions. I do told some of my students now that my Math was not good when they 'awed' at the speed and the way I solved any Maths questions thrown to me. Phew ... I was really not good in Maths ... about 30years ago!
Anyway ... I passed the exams ... I scored an A in my final form-4 exams. Yes, I was positioned #3 in Add-Maths in my school. What an acheivement ... after 8 months of struggling. In form-5, things becoming easier for me ... I just need to continue to do what I need to do. I started jogging ... joining some walks/runs ... as I believe I need 'endurance' and those gruelling runs will train myself to "NEVER GIVE UP". I started to see encouraging results ... people around me started to praise me, that I am a smart boy etc etc ... but on a small table, I worked hours everyday without missing a day!! I am talking about persistance ... want to know that? Ask my family, my old friends(one of them joined my cohort-8 trading class recently. Ghee) ... I was seen as a smart boy who conquered Maths? Huh? Just merely 3 years ago, I was ... err ... a joke in my Math-level?
I continued to work hard ... and joined VI, a very good school for my form-6. STPM Maths was tough back then ... and Further Math is not a subject many want to take. I do scored nearing 100% in Math but not the top in Further Math(many brilliant friends there) ... I struggled but continue to do what I have successfully done in form4&5. Heck ... I never got to the top, also #2 or #3 ... I remembered I always 'lost' to a very smart boy named Bernard ... and another is Danny. Kumar was also one of them ... it was always between us to be the 'top'. As I am not as smart as these guys, I worked doubly hard ... just to keep pace to their standards!! Yes, I was chosen to represent the schools for Math-Olympiad ... but not chosen to represent Malaysia. Bernard was chosen ... year 1985.
Anyway ... I was very proud of my acheivement. Knowing that you are one of the best around making me feel sweet ... of my struggle, of becoming good in my Math. I never looked back ... I went to MU to do my Math-degree ... and started to give Math tuitions to SPM and STPM students ...
I want to be a Math-teacher ... that was my ambition since form 4.
How many of us acheived our ambitions or goals? So, that is my first success ... becoming good in Math, being one of the best around ...
Well, as I was poor, naturally .. I need to financially support my studies in local MU(was about RM800 per year .... but I still could not afford back then). My STPM results was good enough to enter Engineering but ... I have my mind(and heart) focused ... I want to teach Maths!! But but ... teaching won't pay you well? Heck with money ... I just want to teach!! I was naive, financially-retarded back then ... all I want to do is to teach Math and I was to be the best Math-teacher around!! What a challenge to myself ....
So, I started with travelling my buses, or walking for KMs to give tuition. Still remember that I walked many times to SS2(chow-yang) from MU ... long-long walk ... to give tuition!! Weird ... I was so motivated or desperate?
Teaching is not easy ... one may be good in Math, doesnt mean that you could teach well. I have to skip many classes as I was more busy earning some money by giving tuitions ... so, my years in Uni was ... nothing much. I did not get good grades ... but I am very aware of a fact, you DO NOT need strings of A to be a good Math teacher!!
I came out ... to teach in a reputable college. I was young ... and by two-years time, I was awarded the best out-standing young lecturer award by Napeii. Yes, I worked very hard to improve my teaching ... but I think, most of all ... I was very close with most of my students(back then ... 20yrs ago). I helped many ... tho my salary is very small. I do still keep the 'Pewter' with me, but have used the RM200 given as a token. It was also my first time going to a 5-star hotel ... and when my aunt knew about it, she was so proud ... she cried, happily. That was touching ... and to proceed for me to be known as the best around.
Tuition classes increased ... I do have so-called better offer back then, but somehow I was too stupid to move away ... from my comfort zone. I do earn quite a lot as a young lecturer as I was packed with tuition classes ... days and nights ... weekends ... from a tuition center to another's person home. I was tired ... but I was financially-stupid. I did not save ... I used on things I do not need, given away to charity too ... how naive. But being the best Math tutor around ... I am proud of myself and feel successful. MONEY could not buy many things ... one of it is called 'satisfactions' of helping so many around, and they feel appreciative.
I started to get obsessed with the game ... spent hundreds per month on it, improving ... and also, checking my performance. Somehow, I knew bowling is my type of game as it involved mental aspect, in fact .. huge part of the game is psychological. After about 3-4 yrs into the game ... I was still very obsessed. I bought many books, read websites about anything related to bowling, following PBA results, playing league in weekly basis ... competitions ... travelling around the states for games ... I do spent a lot in the game, to improve.
Then, I moved to Sabah .... my bowling activity reduced as I no longer giving a lot of tuitions ... yes, running away from such a hectic life-style in KL .... the stress was tremendous. Sabah ... is the place I loved very much. The pace and the nature suits me ... I no longer being so competitive but I do still bowl about 3 times a week. And always looking forward for the game ... yes, I can beat many of the players there ... and won a few local competition there.
MSN came out with the Sukan-Teras program ... bowling is one of them, so they needs coaches!! I applied and managed to get a place ... to be trained in MSN(have to fly back to Bkt Jalil). The trainers ... I knew them personally as I was active in KL before.
Success is the sweetener ... when you have done many of hours of training, never give up ... and always working to improve in doing better than YOURSELF. I managed to get my coaching cert ...
Why being a coach? Because ... I like teaching. I am so much into education that it is strongly in me that I want to share knowledge, and seeing those we helped improving ... that is called 'satisfaction'. But, I did not pursue into coaching bowling .
I went into my keropok-biz, instead and was too busy for bowling and anything else. I spend my waking hours to work on my biz ... which eventually failed. I see the positive side of failing .... without that, I many not realise how hard it is to do ... business!!
So, I always feel I am successful ... as I defined "SUCCESS" is the IMPROVEMENT in things we are doing, things we want to accomplish ...
The desire to do BETTER than ourselves ... that is SUCCESS to me. Without that burning desire to push ourselves hard enough, we could never face failures ... never know what satisfaction could be when we acheived something close to our heart ....
I still have Trading and my Charity to write about ... and the SUCCESS that I defined. Yes, we need to determine our very own success ... and we DO NOT need to prove it to others, but ...
we need to FEEL we are SUCCESSFUL.
I have successfully written a 'short' reflection on my successes ... and my next goal would be "to be a successful trader" .... "to teach trading successfully" ... and "contribute to charity" ... these are my current goals ... and my directions. Whether I fail or success, it is based on my own definitions.
NO ONE will be giving us an easy path ... we need to draw out our own map.